Too Far Inside Myself

These feelings might change, but right now

There is no place in this world

I can find happiness

I’m trapped in a prison of my own self sabotage

Constantly kicking myself for traits I can’t change

My essence is ugly

Shouldn’t have told you those things that I’ve done

That show I’m not right deep inside

There is no person alive,

Who can make me forget I’m a mess

You can only ease the symptoms,

Never quell my malady

There is nothing I can do

To escape the confines of this lonely cave

I don’t know why I’m like this,

But I wish I could change

I dream

Of laughing and dancing

Carefree in the sun

Surrounded by people I love

Who love me

No obligations or worries

Of things to do, or people to please

I don’t have to try anymore

In my daydreams

I will just be

But I’m trapped


Thought life would’ve taken a turn for the better by now,

Finally figured out it’s me who’s wrong

This demon stalks me everywhere

Yet I’ll always be alone

I crawl further and deeper away from the light

Each day that I make myself open my eyes


One thought on “Too Far Inside Myself

  1. this is very sad. it made me tear. i hope you find strength and the light within yourself. you are a great writer though. this is just very sad and honest. i pray your truth changes

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